Art of Friendship Social-Coping Tip #7: Be Bendy = Flexible

The mighty oak tree has hard wood, good for furniture and building things, but it snaps and falls down during storms! The BENDY palm tree flexes and bends when hurricane wind whips; IT SURVIVES! If your mind isn’t bendy, someone’s feelings will SNAP like the oak tree. You or your partner will be impatient, frustrated, or angry. It’s way better to have a BENDY MIND like the flexible palm tree. If you can make your mind FLEXIBLE, you can bend away from your first idea, and think about OPTIONS, ALTERNATE SOLUTIONS, and COMPROMISES. You can also HANDLE CHANGE and TRANSITIONS. Be BENDY and your feelings and relationships will survive.  

“No”, “Only”, “Now”, “Always”, “Never”, and “My way” are INFLEXIBLE words, NOT BENDY. Someone’s feelings will snap if you think or say those words. “No, it always has to be my way.” Instead, use BENDY words, like, “Yes”, I’ll try”, Later”, “Sometimes”, and “Maybe”. (e.g.“Sure, maybe I can do that later.”) When you use BENDIER words like these, you and others can survive the disagreement or change.

Onward and upward! --Mike